Oct. 29, 2002 ~ Give and take
The good news is that we sold a steer calf, and I thought that might take us closer to getting the computer paid off. The piddly little check arrived from the auction today. How does that work? Feed prices are up, utility prices are up, veterinary prices are up. Beef prices in the grocery store seem to stay consistently high. But producers are going broke, left and right, because the prices they receive for their animals are very low. Crazily low. Word is that there is an investigation into the situation. Does anyone think that will matter? We take the animals to auction, and the buyers come. They bid on the animals, and that's it. If we take the animals to a different auction -- even a distant one -- the same buyers will show up and the prices will be the same, so it makes no difference.
But that little check won't even have a chance to cover cattle feed. Last night I came home to find the tractor disabled, with one tire off, and it's one of the big, expensive tires. So the sale of the steer will cover the price of the tire, and I guess we should count ourselves lucky. It does get discouraging, though. We try so hard, and both of us work hard, and we just seem to get deeper and deeper in debt. We don't blow a lot of money, either. No cable TV, no fancy dinners out, just the occasional Subway sandwiches on the weekend. When was the last time I bought a new outfit? I haven't a clue. A while. We just got College Boy's medical bills paid from his January wreck, and tomorrow I'm having some expensive tests done, so there you go. Deeper and deeper. We don't get one semester's tuition and books paid for... before the next one is due.
There are rumors of layoffs at Husband's company. They were supposed to happen yesterday, though, and didn't. Husband's boss took him aside and told him that he didn't need to worry about his job. Things like that always make me worry!
I shouldn't complain. We have a place to live, food on the table, and the farm. You can't put a price on that kind of beauty or serenity. I can't begin to tell you how nice it is to have all these four-footed babies, and the birds, and the ponds and trees. The space. It's worth it. Everybody struggles, right? Everybody has bills to pay, and unexpected expenses, and emergency funds that get depleted. One of these days, our mortgage will be paid off, and maybe we can breathe a little easier.
Last night, Dakotah was in the stall eating his dinner, and Bucky was waiting impatiently to join him. I stood by the gate, waiting to let him in as soon as Dakotah finished, and Bucky stood right there with me. He slowly and carefully lifted a hind leg in my direction. Anybody else might have thought he was getting ready to kick them, but I stood my ground. Why would he do such a thing? Then he very delicately turned his head and reached past me, careful not to bump me, and nibbled on his back leg. He just had an itchy spot, that's all. I hugged his neck and inhaled his sweet horsey smell.
Okay, so we aren't rich. Total understatement!
But life is good.
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