Oct. 23, 2002 ~ Don't you wish you had a cat?
Last night I was lying on the couch, reading and watching TV, when Misha came and curled up right next to my tummy, purring up a storm. I started to say, "purring to beat the band," but I wonder if anyone uses that "beat the band" expression anymore. Or maybe I just made it up, and it isn't even a real expression. Sometimes things sound so strange and foreign to my ear that I wonder if the expression is truly accurate, or if maybe I'm remembering it wrong.
Anyway. Misha was lying there, purring LOUDLY, being extraordinarly cute and friendly, when Husband said, "That cat sure does love you." Which started THIS conversation...
Me -- Yes, he does. And he's the best cat in the world, AND he's MY cat. Mine, all mine. Brahahahaha! (evil laugh) All the cats are mine, except Pepper, and he's College Boy's. I'll bet you wish you had a cat, don't you?
Him -- (rolling eyes, trying to act as if he has not heard this speech a hundred times before) None of the cats are mine?
Me -- Not even one. Except... maybe...
Him -- Yes?
Me -- If you are very, very nice, MAYBE you can have one of the barn cats. But not one of the good ones. You can't have Squeak, of course. Or Sunshine. Or Max or Mouse or Smoke, or Star. Or Mouse! Or Boots, because she's been letting me pet her lately. Let's see, who does that leave?
Him -- (mumbling) It leaves all the grumpy ones that you don't especially want.
Me -- Right! Then you can have the snotty orange mama cat, or one of the tortoisehells, because they're mostly all fraidy-cats. Or the Not Pepper or Not Squeak. Those are all available.
Him -- I don't want Gizmo, I know that for sure.
Me -- Gizmo! I forgot her! You can have Gizmo and Barney, too. They're both ungrateful brats.
Him -- Tell me... if none of them are mine, why do I have to pay for their food and vet bills and all that?
Me -- Because you're a soft touch?
Him -- shakes his head and smiles.
Well, they really ARE my cats. But I don't mind if Husband borrows them from time to time.
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