Sept. 28, 2002 ~ Well, I'll tell you
the truth. Behind all these recent happy little entries about deer-o and horses and kitties and such... is fear. Serious, gut-wrenching fear. It's this possibility of war with Iraq. Threats. Deadlines. All of a sudden, Afghanistan seems like a relatively safe place for Soldier Boy.
My son is due home next week, for a long-awaited visit, and if I'm not mistaken, on the news I heard mention of a seven-day deadline regarding Iraq. After which...? I do not want my child to go there. No, no, no. People shooting at our boys in Afghanistan is bad enough, but Iraq... I know people who have been there before. One came home with Gulf War Syndrome. Bullets and grenades and bombs are frightening, but the thought of biological warfare makes me ill. I have a bad feeling about all this, a very bad feeling. I can't bear to put it into words.
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One of the heifers is being a goof-ball this morning. I can already tell that it's going to be one of those days. And Husband is at work -- oh, boy; oh, joy. Said heifer wants to be with the bull, and she probably won't let a little thing like a barbed wire fence stand in her way. We can look forward to several more months of this, too.
Flora Ruth is acting stand-offish today. She's standing near the pond, away from the herd, and she did the same thing yesterday. No, she's not just there to get a drink. She's doing the "alone" thing. They usually go off by themselves to calve, but I checked the calendar, and it's actually too soon for her to have a calf. Not by much, but we still don't want any problems. So, Flora, if you could hang on just a little while longer, we would all appreciate it.
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Misha has another tumor, this one on his leg. And he is so thin. I keep thinking that he can't last much longer, declining the way he has. But he still feels good, or at least it seems that way. Oddly enough, when he stopped taking all his pills, he no longer seemed so ill. We thought he was in terrible pain, but it was the medication affecting his mind, his balance, and making him weak. When we stopped the pills, he perked up immediately. Purrs a lot. Doesn't just flop down in exhaustion on the floor. He actually runs and plays sometimes. The tumors are getting worse, though. Spreading, and growing larger. I'm not kidding myself... he's getting worse. But he does seem to feel better. And he loves eating all those treats! Yesterday he had roast beef with the juices from the pan. Today, turkey pastrami (if I can get most of the pepper off of it).
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It's Saturday morning and I am goofing off. Listening to Eva Cassidy and writing this, instead of feeding the babies. Do you think they're saying mean, ugly things about me? No doubt they are. So I'd best get out there.
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