July 18, 2001 ~ Do you ever get tired
of being a grownup? I do. On a regular basis, I do. I get tired of dealing with hard things, with sad things. I can barely remember being a kid... if I didn't have the old photographs as proof, I probably wouldn't believe I'd ever been small.
Well. There are days, you know... there are days when it feels as if the weight of the world is on my shoulders. So many of my friends have such serious problems right now. They are dealing with major losses, with life-threatening illnesses, with major depression. My troubles seem small in comparison. But I feel like I am spread pretty thin, these days. Trying to be there for so many people, and not really doing a very good job of it, and wanting sometimes... for someone to be there for me. But not asking. Because everyone has troubles of their own.
I think I have edited the life right out of this entry. Have cleaned it up and taken the saddest parts out and now it is very short and barely says anything at all. But I guess this is a universal feeling... sometimes I just get tired of being a grownup.
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