June 27, 2001 ~ Letting go
Sometimes I guess you just have to let go, no matter how much it galls you. The other night, I found myself lying awake, thinking about Sam's unpaid vet bill. Not just thinking about it, but fretting over it. Fretting; yes, that sums it up nicely. It was bad enough having to SEE Sam attacked by the dogs, having to witness what they did to him and listen to him "screaming" (or whatever sound a cat makes when it's in agony) for those few seconds... no matter how I try not to think about it, that image has stayed with me. So I'm trying to let go of that one, that's for sure. No need to hold on to that kind of pain, is there? But adding insult to injury was how it happened, and why, and the fact that it most certainly didn't HAVE to happen. I do not blame the dogs' owner, really, I don't. Sad to say, he has no clue. Abandoned dogs are the very least of his problems. But his sons, now they knew better. Grown men, both of them. Both successful businessmen, intelligent, family men... churchgoers. Big churchgoers. They had fine parents, truly. Their mother was a good friend of mine (she died several years ago), and she was, in a word, moral. Always ready and willing to do the right thing. Their dad was the same way. Had he been here when this happened, he would have apologized immediately and INSISTED upon paying the vet bills, then would have done so. He was a man who kept his promises, whose word counted for something.
So how did two parents like that wind up with sons like these? I don't know how they behave in their businesses, in their families... I only know how they've treated their parents over the years (don't ask), and how they've behaved in this situation (badly, wouldn't you say?). See, it's not as if they don't realize that this is their fault and their responsibility. They've both admitted this, and have apologized. If you don't recall the story, here it is in a nutshell... one son gave his dad two puppies, which grew into large dogs, and when the dad had to move in with the other son, neither son wanted the dogs, so they just left them there at the dad's house in the country, alone, and sent money to someone to stop by and feed them. For six months this went on, though I wasn't aware of it until the night the dogs grabbed my cat off our back porch and practically ripped him to pieces while I ran screaming at them, yelling for them to stop. One son agreed to pay the vet bills, and both sons apologized, and you are probably NOT going to be surprised here, but that was the LAST I heard from them. sigh...
No, I'm not surprised. Kinda expected this, didn't you? Oh, and in case there's any doubt whatsoever, both of these sons are well-off and can easily afford to pay this bill. This is small change to them. I'm going to make one more effort to contact them, remind them that the bill is about to be considered past due, and after that, well, I think I'm done. I'm sick of dealing with them. It just isn't worth it to me, and I sure don't like lying awake at night, fretting about something like this. I have to say that it leaves kind of a sour taste in my mouth. Kind of makes you wonder about people, about human nature. So to get rid of that bad taste, I'm going to try to think, instead, of some of the really GOOD people I know, the ones whose goodness sometimes catches me off guard, like Dr. Tom, Sam's vet, and like our neighbor, who just brought 50-something bales of hay over to us the other day, brought two guys to help stack it in the barn, and then REFUSED to let us pay him for any of it. I think I just stood there with my checkbook in hand, my mouth wide open. He said something about me feeding his horses for him while he's out of town, but I've got to tell you, this is NOT a fair trade, and I can't believe he thought this up. He's always doing stuff like this -- oh, he's never donated hay before, and I'm still scratching my head, trying to figure that one out -- but he's always helping people out before they even realize that they need help. Anyway, he's quite a guy, and his wife is just as sweet as she can be. So I'm going to try my best to think of folks like this, those nights when I lie awake, not sleeping. Smiling instead of fretting.
Hey, it works for me.
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